How to dial down exam stress

Teenage years can be a thorny time of transition to adulthood in all kinds of ways. For parents, being ready to support teenage children through a multitude of changes they will experience can be challenging. And with revision season here, it’s likely there will be extra tension at home in the run up to exams.

Naturally every parent wants their children to achieve their best. Unsurprisingly this time can be stressful as both child and parent prepare for one of the first high pressure situations teenagers are likely to encounter in life. Here we explore ways you can support your youngster, and offer advice from young adult’s wellbeing expert, Jessica Dallington of Dallington Associates.

Talk to your child

Ask your child how they’re feeling about the exams. Is there anything particularly worrying them? Is it something you could help with, or would extra tuition be helpful? Could you encourage them to talk to their teacher about specific concerns? When it comes to revision, how do they feel most comfortable doing this, and still maintain the discipline needed? Some work best in silence, whereas others need ambient noise, music or like to study in a group. Or perhaps a mix of all of these.

Jessica Dallington:

 “Empower your child to help themselves, be mindful of the counterproductive effect that pressure may have on their motivation and focus. For parents with demanding time schedules it may be helpful to introduce a support team that can encourage your child with their executive functioning (planning) and revision. Whenever introducing any support, the relationship is a key marker of success and so we recommend you ‘shop around’ and ensure your child likes and enjoys working with whomever is brought on. 

Reassure them that however they do, you will be proud of them. It’s likely they are putting a lot of pressure on themselves already so feeling supported no matter what the outcome may help ease some worries.

Check in with the school

If your child is feeling particularly anxious they might not be forthcoming with what’s going on for them.

Jessica notes, “keep an eye out for children who give the consistent impression that all is going smoothly. The reality is that exam preparation is a universally stressful experience and so this may signal they are having trouble asking for help. A certain level of nerves and irritability is to be expected but remain curious and check in if they seem particularly withdrawn or are drastically altering the fundamentals of their routine (such as sleep and diet).”

It could be useful to have a quick phone call with their form teacher to understand how things have been going from their perspective. They may have suggestions on the areas where your child could focus, or have positive feedback around your child’s progress  that could alleviate some of their anxiety.

Schedule revision (and fun!)

Creating a timetable for revision can be really helpful. It can help both discipline their time, but also prevent your child from overdoing it and burning themselves out. It will also ensure they balance their time well across all subjects. Make sure to schedule some time for rewards and fun activities too.

If your child is struggling to get down to the revision Jessica has this advice:

“This is a sign that something is acting as an obstacle. Procrastination often has its rooting in a sense of overwhelm or limited skills in planning and managing time effectively. Gently unpick this with your child and consider creative ways of breaking down revision into more manageable and approachable tasks – Is their current revision plan realistic? Are there particular times of day they find themselves most ‘switched on’ that they can maximise? Having both small and larger rewards to work towards can also be hugely motivating during this period, and this is something parents can talk through with their children, in a collaborative manner.”

Your Consider it Done PA team can template and build a revision schedule for your family calendar, and book some weekend fun activities too. If this is something you would find helpful, ping your team in the Delegate phone app or send them a message via your CiD team Whatsapp group.

Dallington specialises in providing tailored psychological, educational, and professional programmes designed to support teenagers and young adults, typically aged 16-30.

Recognising the unique challenges faced by this demographic, Dallington offers understanding, encouragement, and practical solutions to empower their mentees to overcome obstacles and thrive. To find out more, visit www.dallington.co